The last week of student teaching is here!! I am so busy this week with things other than student teaching. I can’t believe it is over already. What an amazing time of growth. I feel secure in finding a job even though the odds are against me this year. I keep promising myself I won’t freak out until late summer. Then I’ll sub like a mad woman until I find a job.

Until then, real life, not swamped with two schooling experiences, here I come.

Genie Appeared to a California Man

One day a genie appeared to a California man and offered to grant him one wish.

The man said:” I wish you’d build a bridge from here to Hawaii so I could drive there anytime”

The genie frowned” I don’t know. It sounds like quite an undertaking,” he said. “Just think of the logistics. The supports required reaching the bottom of the ocean, the concrete, and the steel! Why don’t you pick something else?”

The man thought for a while and then said, “Okay, I wish for a complete understanding of women- what they are thinking, why they cry. I wish I knew how to make a woman truly happy”.

The genie was silent for a minute, then said “So how many lanes did you want on that bridge?”

Week one was like trial by fire. Classroom management: hardest, hardest thing. Now I’m bribing them with sticker charts and all they can do is complain about the darn stickers. Augh! New rule: complain about stickers–lose stickers.

I have been teaching poetry and today we did a poem that involved opposites and patterns. One girl decided to pick the opposites of rich and poor, because, and I quote “We’re very wealthy.” Well, GLORY BE Vercua Salt!!! I cringed but told her, that they were indeed opposites and she could continue with her Paris Hilton-inspired poem.

Here is my fake version of her poem using the pattern.  Maybe I’ll show it to her tomorrow. It might make her think.

Rich

wealthy, monied

spending, charging, splurging

carefree, luxury — not much, meager

scrimping, moonlighting, praying

value, save

Poor

So this little girl is so very “wealthy” because  her father is a Doctor of Urology. When I told this story to my co-operating teacher I had to make the joke “So, when say your family is wealthy you really mean urine the money?” Okay, lame. I’ve been reading to many knock, knock jokes.

Today begins my three weeks student teaching my class on my own. I’ve very nervous even though I feel prepared. I think I’ll leave early today and get my bearings about me. Will I be attacked by the wolves? Will they listen? Will this be a glorious ending to a already wonderful student teaching experience? Hopefully, only the last.

Actually, I’ve talked to more than one person who had such a horrible student teaching experience that they didn’t want to be a teacher right away. Sad. Instead of getting you ready to go the teacher freaks you out. I am very thankful I have a teacher who oozes grace and compassion.

Last night in class a normally, very sweet, very patient classmate spoke out about the fifth graders she was teaching. “It was so frustrating. They were so needy. It was as if they needed me to hold their hand. I felt pulled in every direction because if I was helping one student I wasn’t able to get to the other 20-something kids. What should I do?”

Our professor, a retired teacher and principal said, “You wouldn’t happen to be teaching a group of Elementary Education graduate students would you?”

Oh, how roles switched. During my two weeks off I forgot to turn in two assignments! Luckily, I was able to turn them in late and get a B+, my first B of the whole program. Sad. I see the importance of getting my Master’s before I’m in a career where I must bust my hump everyday. I don’t know how teachers are able to teach and go back to school. But then I thought working, parenting and going to school would be unthinkable and it has happened, B+ not withstanding.

“Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it onto completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6
Right now I’m inspired to learn about positive talk, educational encouragement and how to tap into that self talk and make it work for children. There is much talk about how we live in a society with too much praise. We are praised when we get last place. We all are winners, we all are superstars, etc. But there is also a lot of self-doubt among children. They are very sensitive at a young age to labels, feelings of being a disappointment or feeling less than the whole. What are we not saying, or saying correctly, to really encourage children to have faith in their abilities and find their own intrinsic motivation to learn?

Today our sermon in church was about how Jesus took 12, essentially flawed, very human men, and through his belief and confidence in them (and of course his amazing teaching) helped them transform into great teachers, leaders and men. As teachers, we too are only limit children by our own expectations of them. What kinds of things do we say to help them see that we see their potential and that we have strong faith in the their abilities and future accomplishments if they choose to try and work toward being their very best?

I am thinking of ways that I can try and make that connection in words that don’t sound too canned, too overly-praising and hit the buttons of self confidence and intrinsic motivation. Of course, I’ll need many ways to say things and many opportunities to say them. That’s probably why there are millions of books on teaching. One day, when I’ve read a dent of them, it will be time for me to retire. But until then, I feel like its a good experiment to continue to throughout my teaching.

A study was conducted where certain teachers were told that they were teaching a group of gifted children. They were not allowed to tell the students they were gifted or tell others about the students gifts. At the end of the study the childrens’ test scores rose significantly versus the teachers who were not secretly told their students were gifted. Of course the students were normal and the teacher’s perception of the students was the only thing that was altered. What amazing changes! In the time of testing, testing, testing and labeling, labeling, labeling, isn’t it amazing what something as simple as not knowing everything about a student and assuming only the best can do for students?

“Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.” Philippians 4:8

So during the day when I can’t blog I think of a million things to write about. Now, that I have a moment to do so (and a full week by myself) I can’t eek one creative thing out.
I spend my days encouraging 2nd graders to write what they see, smell, hear and touch in their stories. Right now I feel numb, drained and pooped out.
I had my first teacher dream. I dreamt I was back in 3rd grade. Even though I was as intelligent as my normal 35 year-old self (whatever that means) my teacher didn’t like me and asked me questions like “Name one major news story from yesterdays headlines.” I am notorious for not reading the paper or listening to the news daily. I had no answer and was berated by the teacher. In my dream I sighed and looked around at my Parent Trap (sans child) situation. This time around I was friends with the popular kids. That looked good. I began to fill out my third grade worksheet only to watch my hand writing the word “puzzle” with perfect cursive zees. Wow, I know cursive, and none these other third graders do! Maybe this isn’t so bad.
What does this mean? It means I am okay with being back in third grade as long as I am smarter and more popular than I was the first time around. Eureka! I am the teacher!

Now that I’m becomming a teacher I thought it would be funny to list my favorite mean teachers from movies and T.V.  Now that I have been a teacher (all-be-it without pay) I can start to see something more human about them.

10.  The principal from the Breakfast Club, Principal Vernon. Barry Manilow doesn’t know that he raids his wardrobe. He’s an old school bully principal. The giant jerk, but very memorable.

9.   The principal from Ferris Buller. He tries to be like the other princiapl but ends up looking desperate and weak. By the end of the movie you feel pretty sorry for him. He’s truly unlikeable for most of the film. The secretary is a sweety, though.

8.   Principal Skinner, living with his mommy, teacher dating, hot headed principal. He’s the true example of power misplaced.

7.   Mr. Hand is my favorite mean teacher. He’s not really that mean, he’s just trying to teach a giant stoner and insists on ruining the said stoner’s buzz. As a teacher I can see that he actually cares about the baked student and tries to reach him in creative ways, like giving away his pizza. Some teachers would just let him space out and flunk him.

6.  Professor Snape, the classic nerd-becomes-teacher. This is why you don’t go to the same school as your parents, and you don’t teach at the same school as you attended. I personally love Professor Snape, he is the perfect foil to Harry’s oh-so-chosen oneness.

5.   I don’t know his character’s name, but Ben Stiller nails the apathetic High School Teacher role on the head. Of course I feel that way taking hot lunch count, when no one is listening… nachos, nachos grande, who wants nachos grande…anyone?

To be continued.

I am halfway through my student teaching and part of me feels ready to teach, and part of me thinks I need to know more. After spring break I teach for the last three weeks. I hope I can get everything in place before then so it will be smooth sailing.

To everyone I’ve been out of contact with for the last year or so, I’m sorry. I hope soon I’ll have a life again and lots of free time!! Unless, I really do get a job as a teacher, then I’ll see you on the breaks!

I found this as a response on a Carrie Fisher’s blog. I really, really like this story and wanted to share.  If the author finds this and reads it, please give yourself credit.

Here’s a story for you: 20 years ago, I knew an obese eating disorder specialist who treated anorexic women. She was seriously obese. No joke!
She used to remind me of Mama Cass with the long brown hair, eccentric clothing and tiny spiked heels. I used to ask myself, “How the heck can this obese woman sit in a room, and run a eating disorder group for a bunch of frail women who are discussing their weight issues?”
I mean, here these women were having conversations about not wanting to eat in fear of becoming fat and here was this specialist living the fear. She was the nightmare all these thin women starved themselves for in order to avoid.
Amazing….but then it dawned on me that this specialist wasn’t the nightmare- she was the inspiration. You know why?
Because she liked herself-she was happy being who she was. That was her silent message as she sat there: It’s not about the weight, it’s about being comfortable in our own skin.